"I SPY"
A MOVIE REVIEW BY ALEX GRANT
A monstrously inept, perfunctory and flaccid "comeback"

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Directed by Betty Thomas Starring: Eddie Murphy, Owen Wilson, Famek Janssen, Malcolm McDowell

In a nutshell : I-nane S-nidy P-isspoor Y-awn .

A monstrously inept, perfunctory and flaccid "comeback" – one of far too many such – movie for all-time has-been of has-beens Eddie Murphy.

I SPY fulfils Murphy’s Law which is that anything that can go wrong it will go wrong. Director Betty Thomas’ I SPY is a cavort-cutely-by-numbers spy caper that surely breaks all previous world records for total abstinence from wit, drive and charm: M y name is Betty and I’m a boreaholic!!. Recycling ad nauseam his customary tiresome motor-mouth guttersnipe schtick Murphy – who can enunciate ‘innuendo’ as "in yo’ end ho’ - brilliantly and with utter conviction personifies the terminally irritating blowhard narcissist and dickhead- a peerless prick. He’s better at this prick schtick than the lamentable Martin Lawrence having done it so more often. Snide, sexist to-the-max, and pseudo-studly – his agent still claims Eddie is six feet tall, when you can see co-star actress Famke Janssen at 5’ 10 " towering over him, even with his shoe ‘lifts. Eddie still suffers from the delusion that he IS The Man -child.

Cast (surely against type !) as a preening powder-puff pugilist picked personally by George Dubya to retrieve a state-of-the-art stealth bomber stolen by an ‘international arms dealer’ of Magyar extraction – a tedious pouting aetioled emaciated Eurotrash Malcolm McDowell big-shot bozo – Kelly (Murphy) is teamed up with blond surfer mimbo/male bimbo Alex (Owen Wilson) a bumbling resentful sexually inept Special Agent from BNS (Broken Nose Syndrome ? examine Wilson’s schnozzola….) This odd couple ( much tedious tiresome homoerotic byplay ) eludes a heinous horde of hirsute Hungarian henchmen who couldn’t hit a barn door with an alley-sweeper sawn-off shotgun. All men of Magyar descent should sue ,even their moustaches are risible. Shot entirely in lazy close-ups I SPY looks grungier than a Sixties’ ‘Matt Helm/ Dean Martin’ or ‘Derek Flint/ James Coburn’ spy spoof. It elicited from me one sickly grin and one heartfelt groan during the resquisite 90 minutes of total tedium. It is a gross insult to anyone over five years of age to be expected to pay for this pathetic pig-in-a-poke. © Alex Grant November 2002 (Alex is too kind -it was pathetic Famke Janssen deserves better than this - Ed) < Back to Index < Reply to this Article © Hackwriters 2002