The International Writers Magazine:Movie Review

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Iron Man Directed by Jon Favreau Screenplay: Mark Fergus, Hawk Ostby Distributed by Paramount Pictures Starring Robert Downey jnr, Terrence Howard, Jeff Bridges, Gwyneth Paltrow • Jack Clarkson Well. I just got back from the premiere of Iron Man. I saw Robert Downey Jr in person on the red carpet, and Gwyneth Paltrow has a really nice pair of legs! Usually Leicester square is seething with fans trying to get a glimpse of people that happen to be filmed on screen for a living. There seems to be a distinct lack of hype for this movie, which is a pity, because it’s probably the best thing that Marvel has ever put onto celluloid in a long time!

As the familiar Marvel logo materialises above the flipping comic book pages. (seriously, who does that in real life? It would damage the spine!) The Heavy guitar riffs of AC/DC’s "Back In Black" blare out at you while we see a convoy of Humvee’s in Afghanistan, Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr) sits in the back of one of them with a glass of whiskey in his hand while he flirts with the female soldier driving the car, and then everything starts to explode!

I wish I could end that sentence with "And It Gets Better From There" I really do… But Iron Man suffers from one of the key mistakes that most superhero movies make. The Original Story! At least half an hour of the film is devoted to how Tony has his change of heart which catalyses his career change from arms dealer to crime fighter. Thankfully Downey Jr. carries the part so well that the resulting scenes were merely above average, in contrast to the trouser-soilingly, face-meltingly oh-my-god-did-you-see-what-just-happened! scenes where Tony is either building or using the suit!

The only flaw these scenes had was how few and far between they were, and that they had to eventually end, like how all beautiful living things must eventually die.

Nobody but Robert Downey Jr. himself could ever have played Tony Stark quite so well. And Gwyneth Paltrow, Jeff Bridges and Terrence Howard were all excellent in their supporting roles, although I now get the feeling that Jeff Bridges supports to no-one! And if you suggest he does then he will kill you in your sleep!

The remaining scenes, while paling in comparison, are necessary though. Because for the sequel they introduced not only War-Machine, they also set up S.H.I.E.L.D. an organisation run by a man called Nick Fury, who it is believed is going to be played by Saumuel L Jackson.

When the credits rolled on this movie I closed my eyes and imagined what the sequel will be like, with no tedious origin story but with Nick Fury, War Machine and S.H.I.E.L.D. A single tear rolled down my cheek. For I knew that the world would not be ready for something like that for many years! Because it will probably cure cancer, aids, influenza and malaria overnight. The world will unite, there will be dancing in the streets and all religions will settle their differences when they realise that they have been fighting over nothing for centuries, they will bow down low and worship this movie as if it were a god! Unless they get Brett Ratner to direct it or something…

If you’re a fan of the original comics you will have nothing to complain about, and if you do then please help yourself to a toilet-duck enema! If you’re not really into the comics but have enjoyed other comic book films then you will probably enjoy this. This is very much a nerd’s film in subject matter, soundtrack and humour. So this film may not be for some people, but if you have a friend or boyfriend who is a nerd, then take him to see this film because it will make him very, very happy!
© Jack Clarkson April 28th 2008
shl60522@port.ac.uk

Cybernation by Erica Blaney

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