The International Writers Magazine - Positive Living taking
steps to change your life
gods have spoken and they say it is cruise time.
Towe on her way to Alaska
Well it is
hard to believe that it is 2004. Was it not just yesterday that
everyone was waiting for the world to end at the millennium? What
has changed? War goes on, and if they have their way, could bring
the end to everything. Debt catches up, children grow, and we
all get older or do we?
here - book your cruise
not complaining, its just that when you reach my age and have
so many changes in your life, you notice things differently. I have
this stigma of a larger number attached to my back. I am not John Travolta
and Oprah, so turning 50 this year wont be celebrated quite in the same
way. I have so much that I want to do, but, (theres always a but,)
I have responsibilities, such as children, business, pets and a younger
mind in an older body.
I have decided to try and date again. Yes I finally separated, and thank
God remain on very friendly terms. We are very good friends and care
about each other, but now that we are separated spouses, we are better
of without each other. So now I can date.
There is only one problem with dating, and that is finding someone to
date with. In the seventies, it was so much easier to meet people; every
one was so much more open. Now people have become sceptical and mistrusting,
I understand why, but it is sad.
I go for a walk with my dog Kokomo, who is now 2 years old, I find
that doggie walkers always nod and smile. When we go for our coffee
and treat (which she shares of course) I find that the smokers are
quite chatty but alas being asthmatic, I cannot date a smoker. My
work is helping people with their transient lives, so no meeting
anyone there; they are not ready for me. I am not a committee person,
so thats out. Yes I have looked at the e-dating and so far
cannot say I am impressed.
I have decided on a cruise.
I realised that I have to put myself in the way of people, not just
men, but also a new type of people to socialize with and branch out
with. It is very easy to stay in a rut when there is no one to grab
your waving hand to pull you out of the mud. So enough waiting- time
to climb out. Time to move on. Need a drastic change.
I am going on a cruise for my age group (49.5 and trying to hold on)
and looking for interesting people who love life and good conversation.
I have not danced in so long I need to remember how.
I have not been at a table with fun, light hearted people in so many
years I have forgotten what it is like. The joy of meeting people who
like a lively talk about life and living would be great.
One thing I would be nervous about, is meeting a new man. Do flirting
techniques come back? And do they know the difference between flirting
and sexual advances? I am not ready to be chased around the ship just
yet,. He might get thrown overboard. Is there anything worse when dating,
than having a horny creep hanging all over you? I must say I do like
a man with a sense of humor, some consideration and a zest for life.
They do still exist dont they?
So I am booked, Alaska here I come. On May 5th I will embark on an adventure
that I hope will enlighten me and lead me towards making new friends.
I am on the Holland Lines "The Voleendon" which I understand
is a new ship (built 2000) I will have a cabin to myself, (at great
cost to go single) but worth it. I have already purchased one nice evening
outfit. This suit reminds me of my mother when she did cruises. A raw
silk 2 piece in champagne colour with gold beaded colour. She would
approve. Clothes wise I am ready. I am also getting my eyes lazored
before I go, so as not to look like my grandma any more.
I am tweaking my poor old bod and tuning my mind.
I will be ready!
I am glad that it is not a hot cruise, I prefer a spring cruise, as
I am not a swim bunny. I look forward to reading on deck in the cool
spring breeze, and then meeting people over lunch, dinner, and coffees.
We travel up the inside of the coast so I will see spectacular sights,
and I will visit the melting glaciers in all their glory. It will be
so nice not to have to worry if anyone else with me is happy, just myself
to worry about. The first time in 23.5 years, so I will relish in my
There are 3 restaurants on this ship, each different in size and style.
So I can move around a bit and meet new and interesting people. I do
hope that they have a juice bar, as I love having fresh juice every
A swim a day for exercise and walks around the decks (unfortunately
without my Kokomo (Border collie) should all be very pleasant.
I believe that at mealtime they seat you with your own age. This is
good as I do not want to be with too young or too old.
When I was young and single, I travelled a lot. Twenty-two countrys
in all. I went from country to country, met many an interesting person,
and experienced many wonders. Just to have a taste of that again even
for a week is great. Though what is very odd is that when I try and
think like a single woman again, I find myself feeling as if I am in
my 20s. I look at men and see then, as I would have then. Very
disconcerting. But alas as I move forward, life will remind me of age
So many think that when you become single again, that you automatically
want to get out there and grab another man. Or that you are sex starved
and cannot handle being alone. Well the truth of the matter is, that
you feel a relief being on your own, and sex oh what a bother, you need
a man for that! (Some women dont, of course) and as for grabbing
another man just for the sake of it, no way thank you. I like my own
company, but I would like to share myself and family and friends with
someone who has the same interest and values and above all treats me
with respect. When I meet that person, I would be glad to have him as
a partner. It is true that sometimes life is lonely, but to fill it
just for the sake of it is not worth the pain or trouble. Read a good
book and lunch with good friends I say.
So I await my destiny and put myself out there in the big picture, and
trust in my fate to unfold. So I will see how it changes my life.
You never know I could be later this year celebrating my 50th birthday
in style, but what is for sure I will be turning the new 40 come what
may. So heres hoping that it will be a great one, and the effects
of this cruise will be a happy and lasting one too.
Make wonderful dreams come true.
© Sara Towe Feb 2004
Sara runs postiveliving.ca and offers courses on positive ways of living
in Vancouver Canada.
all rights reserved